Monday, July 27, 2009

Collection of Things I've Said Today (Not Exhaustive)

Feel free to let me know in the comment thread if you've ever said any of these before.

1. Hey there. What can I do for you?

2. Would you like a big one or a little one?

3. I thought you were working Tuesday.

4. I haven't had to do anything today that caused me pain.

5. Mocha for Erica. Erica. Mocha.

6. Do you live around here?

7. I would try Salvation Army.

8. When I come back you better be ready to put in your order, otherwise you'll keeping doing badly in your job interview.

9. Oh, really?

10. I don't think anyone has noticed.

11. They'd be all like, hooray, we've finally penetrated the Muslim community.

12. Does that taste okay?

13. Oh, ok.

14. No, she was just a crazy person. A lune.

15. Hellooooo Kevin!

16. Whenever I lose my voice, I try to talk as much as possible.

17. It makes talking an adventure.

18. I was going to make a pie for his party anyway, so that could work out rather perfectly.

19. So uh give me a call and we can figure out a time.

20. Yesssssss.

21. Refill?

22. Your total will be $6.68 Jason Bennett.

23. And if you could just sign this copy for me.

24. How much are you gonna expand?

25. Do you have time to wait - I have to brew another pot.

26. But I know if I say like "hey it's too cold in here, turn down the AC" they'll change it, and I'll be all like "hey hey it's too hot in here." So I usually just wear a sweatshirt.

27. Hey, hows it going?

28. That shouldn't be a problem um I just need to talk to the employee who is working tomorrow. How many people will you have? Ok, 6-8 people is great.

29. Whooosh

(NOTE: The last one was posted on a gmail conversation. The rest were spoken word.)


saracita said...

2, 4, 12, 21, 24, and 29:

That's what s/he said.

I'm sorry. I tried to stop myself but I couldn't.

-your most mature friend

The Smack Daddy said...

Turns out I'm a huge pervert.

But on the bright side, you did give me a great idea: why don't I write down everything I say, only keep the cute bits, compile it into a book, and title it "That's What She Said" with a really cute font and a picture of a Sun rising (specifically our sun) in a somewhat decayed urban area or something, and lonely 30-somethings would LAP THAT SHIT UP.

Elizagerth said...

Certainly #20 is also what she said.

Ms. Gretchen said...


i'm glad that you're making poem lists

it's interesting to compare with those of my man

i like sara and elizabeth's re-interpretation that totally changed it. made me think today!

The Smack Daddy said...

Honestly, I'm sort of glad that no one has done a "that's what she said" for number 11.

Glad you likey like Gretchy Gretch.