Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Clairvoyance?

It's frustrating to hear the busy signal of a friend when you're trying to tell them great news.
It's weird to think that it's frustrating to hear a busy signal when they're almost entirely extinct at this point. We have voicemail now. Why am I frustrated to hear the busy signal of a friend? How less frequent it is than their voice! And most certainly of a ringing phone!
What a beautiful, beautiful, repetitious beep.
More like an irritating throb that never reaches a climax.
It just keeps going 'til I hang up, holding onto my great news for later. Stuck inside my mouth.
The busy signal is my friend at this point.
Buh Buh Buh to you too, mister.
Sorry to gender a noise.
I just drank steamed milk. It was delicious.
I feel really guilty for not enjoying a sound. Especially one that is so endangered.
It's just that I have really great news, and I wanted to tell it now, not later, because I'm at work and it's spring break so all the students are gone and I have nothing to do. Except I have a lot to do, but not a whole lot that I really want to do right now, so I'm listening to a busy signal.
It's really not all that bad.
Phone must be off the hook. Nobody talks this long.

Friday, February 13, 2009

As one of five digits, and as companion to four fingers

The thumb
The thumb is the lateral-most digit of the hand.
The pinky
The little finger, often called the pinky in American English and pinkie in Scottish English (from the Dutch word pink, meaning little finger), is the most ulnar and usually smallest finger of the human hand.
Opposite the thumb, next to the ring finger.
The ring finger
The ring finger is the fourth digit of the human hand, and the second most ulnar finger, located between the middle finger and the little finger.
The index finger
The index finger, also referred to as, pointer finger, forefinger, trigger finger, digitus secundus, or digitus II, is the second finger of a human hand.
The middle finger
The middle finger (also the long finger and usually the longest finger) is the third digit of the human hand, located between the index finger and the ring finger. It is also called the third finger, digitus medius, digitus tertius, or digitus III in anatomy. Mainly used by Mr. Myncia

(who the hell is mr. myncia)
In many Western countries extending only the middle finger and sometimes along with the thumb of the same hand, is an offensive and obscene gesture, colloquially known as "flipping a bird" or "Flipping someone off." In some cultures, the middle finger is used as an index, to point things out.
I use my middle finger to make money

It is located between the first and third digits - that is, between the thumb and the middle finger. It is usually the most dextrous and sensitive finger of the hand, though not the longest.
The English word "finger" has two senses, even in the context of appendages of a single typical human hand:

1. The four digits, not including the thumb.
2. Any of the five digits.
According to László A. Magyar, the names of the ring finger in many languages reflect an ancient belief that it is a magical finger. It is named after magic or rings, or called nameless.

The ring finger on this hand is circled.

There is some evidence that the ratio between the lengths of the index finger and the ring finger may be modulated by androgen exposure in the uterus.
this is the right ring finger. this is the right ring finger. this is the ring fight finger. this is the finger right ring. hell, this is your right ring finger

Hello, I am the thumb. I am one of five, companion of four.
Hello, thumb.
Hello thumb!
Why 'ello mate!
Heya thumb.

In the USA a pinky swear or pinky promise is made when a person wraps one of their pinky fingers around the other person's pinky and makes a promise.


This is a picture of the pinky finger extended.

pinky pink. dinky dink. pinky.

Also in Japan, holding up a little finger while speaking of two people signifies that they are in a relationship.
Similarly, in Indonesia, when a man points his little finger downward it is a signal that he needs to urinate

So many fingers so many thumbs! So many monkeys drumming on drums!

In Australia, when a male driver is showing signs of road rage, women hold up their pinkie fingers.


More finger porn for your enjoyment.
This picture is of a human hand - index finger extended.


No picture of middle finger available.
Black sheep of the bunch...Middle finger has gone down a poor path.
We don't talk about middle finger in front of dad.

That's not just a finger. It's so much more than just a finger.
That's all we should really say about the middle finger.


I am the thumb.
I am the beginning of the hand.
I am the sign of approval.
I am the grip.
I am the straw that broke the camel's back.
I am the curve.
I am the space bar.
I am one of five, companion of four.
Thumby thumb thumb, thanks for the thumb.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

I Apologize

I A Pile of Eyes

I'm sorry. I'm in a state of trying to discover myself through different blog layouts.

Have I been unhappy because I've been using templates? Or have I been using templates because I'm unhappy?

I like to call this version "poop chic." It took me at least 5 minutes to find acceptable shades of brown to lay against each other. At least I feel original and less inclined toward self-deprecation now.

In order for this not to be a dreadfully narcissistic post (The whole world holds their breath as Theresa switches from color scheme to color scheme. Bracing themselves against their seats as she changes the font color from black to egg-white. "No! Not that one! Gone are the good days! Welcome, Chaos, you foul master!"), I will post a series of links to pictures that I think are pretty:

Remember: No reason to think our alphabet is the only one around. Lots of other languages have equally important and interesting alphabets.

In a similar vein, I thought this was an excessively interesting suggestion.

Have you ever met this woman? If I ever met her, I would tell her a happy thing. She looks so sad. I found her by Google Image Searching "Smacky the Insufferable." That is not a good example of a happy thing.

This is a picture of Pablo Neruda with a statue of a breasty lady behind him. Sorry to spoil the surprise!

This picture presents a lot of interesting points for discussion. What I find of particular interest is that the man's photobucket.com address implies that his name is "Adam Lester." Oh, if only his middle name was "Oliver." See if you can put that all together.

Sometimes, I do require a professional clown.

This is a link a to the color blue.

Google searching the color purple is a huge pain in the ass because of THAT DAMN BOOK! Sorry, I'm really emotionally caught up in this. This is the best example of it that I can get for now.

Breakfast.

I'm gonna go do that picture now. I miss you. I miss you all.